As week three of my new life comes to a close my mind is swirling with so many new experiences, with new knowledge, and with new connections. My visceral response to this is, "GET ALL THE THINGS DONE NOW!!!!" But that's not the way the world works. There is a process to work through and to deny that process to myself by jumping ahead would be a great disservice.
As humans we agonize over the future, we agonize over the past, we blow off the present. At least this human does that more often than not. I have especially been about the future, particularly about the end result. I gravitated toward working with the computer because it was so easy to come up with a concept, then a short time later see the result. Checking something off a list was always my end game. I've been missing out.
I have a lot of work ahead of me. I mean a LOT of work. Just to reach my 9 month goal of having a show of some sort will be an uphill climb. Simply completing a single piece in a reasonable amount of time is one of the challenges I am facing. However, though I'm more driven than I have ever been in my life, I have changed my focus to be more present in the process.
Perhaps it's the style of work I find myself creating, where it's slow and deliberate. I have to be entirely in the moment or mistakes will be made. If that's it, I'm forever grateful. My mind is dwelling less on the past these days. A feat within itself really. And though I look to the future, I find myself delegating specific times of the day or week to plan and to do work specific to those goals. This has given me the opportunity to actually live in the moment more than ever.
Living in the moment is hard. Even as I write this blog I find myself just wanting to finish it. But now I am beginning to see the value in paying attention to the ideas as they come. I see the value in taking the time to document my journey. I even see the value in writing an entirely different blog, only to erase it because it was only meant to be a spark for something new. So, in the end, there is no need to hurry to the finish line. Life goes fast enough as it is.
Where is your head these days? In the past? In the future? In the here and now? I would love to hear about a time that the journey was your focus, rather than the destination.